[00:00:00] Welcome to the Business Miracles podcast. I'm Heather Dominick, founder of www.businessmiracles.com and author of the book Different The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution, found at www.differentthebook.com. Since 2010, I've been training Highly Sensitive Entrepreneurs and Leaders from around the globe to work less while making more impact and income by doing things differently. I'm so glad you joined me. Listen in and get ready. Get ready for a shift in the way you view yourself, your work, your life. A business miracle.
[00:00:40] This is a course in Business Miracles podcast, episode 191, Cost versus Investment as an HSP in business in this episode, I share how my own shift in perception on cost versus investment was the key in changing my relationship with money and my experience with abundance. I go in depth about the difference between cost and investment and how taking personal responsibility to release negative beliefs about money and to define what you value, not society, your family, friends, or even your religion values, is crucial in bringing about your own shift in perception. So let's begin to see how you too can make this shift and take the reins in deciding where you want to most invest your time, your energy, and your money in business and life.
[00:01:39] Today's topic, Money Mindset 2.0. The next level of money mindset for highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders.
You might not like the message. And you might really not like the message of this training. And as a result, you might not like me. But I am not here to be your friend. I am here to be your mentor. And most importantly, as always, the choice is yours. You can take what I'm going to share with you and really allow it to open your mind, break you out of socialized concepts of money limitation, enter you into a freedom space of flow and creation or not. And I am not attached. The choice is yours.
According to Louise Hay, most people get angry when they first hear that money is the easiest thing to demonstrate, but it is true. But we must release our negative reactions to it and our negative beliefs about it first. She also said, "It's easier to teach a workshop on sexuality than on money. People get incredibly angry when their beliefs about money are challenged." So today on this training, we start with a prayer. A prayer from author, yoga and meditation teacher Tosha Silver and her book “Change Me Prayers”.
“Change me Divine Beloved into one who can roll with what cannot change. Grateful even for hard knocks. Let me embrace all tests even when they come. And may I release any fear of financial loss, knowing all can be replenished with ease by divine will.” Breath in, and let it out.
What I appreciate most about Tosha Silver's work is her emphasis on personal responsibility. The book is titled, “Change Me Prayers”. Not, “Give to Me Prayers”. Not, “I Deserve More Prayers”. Not, “Make it Happen for Me Prayers”, but “Change Me Prayers”. “Change me Divine Beloved into one who can release any fear of financial loss, knowing all can be replenished with ease by divine will.”
And here is where we enter into the possibility of a shift in perception, a miracle when it comes to cost versus investment. Let's start with definitions, shall we? Cost, noun, an amount that has to be paid or spent to buy or obtain something.
Investment, also a noun, an act of devoting time, effort, or energy to a particular undertaking with the expectation of a worthwhile result.
For me, making the mindset shift from cost to investment was key in changing my relationship with money, my money story, and then therefore my experience with abundance. If as highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders, our nervous system is wired to take in stimulation at a much higher degree than those who are not highly sensitive. To me, it only makes sense to consciously choose what I use for stimulation. The concept of cost for me as a highly sensitive entrepreneur is an experience, a stimulation of loss. This activates fear, worry, concern. As a highly sensitive, I feel this deeply. The concept of investment for me as a highly sensitive entrepreneur is an experience, a stimulation of gain. This activates possibility, creativity, privilege of agency. I feel this deeply.
For years now, the lens of investment is what I choose to see through. And most importantly for me to challenge socialized concepts of both cost and investment. For example, society says buying a daily Starbucks coffee is a cost. Is it? Society says buying a house is an investment. Is it? Now, I'm not saying either it is or isn't for either one. I'm saying the choice is yours. It's your privilege of agency to decide what it is for you. In order to do that, you must deeply know your own personal values. Not your family of origin values, not our religious institution's values, not even your best friend's values. Your values.
What do you value when it comes to time, energy, and money? During a private mentor session private with an HSL++ member, she said, "Why is it socially acceptable to spend $30,000 to renovate a bathroom but not to invest in your health?" Great question to seriously ponder.
Another example, a dichotomy I find so fascinating is that typically highly sensitives love learning, right? Give me another book, a degree, a certification. Yet since I've now been doing this work for 20 years, I can't even count the number of times I've seen highly sensitives resentful of being asked to invest to receive that learning. What is it about this fascinating socialized concept that we shouldn't have to invest to receive support? Why do we put the pressure on our family of origin or even a partner or spouse, or goodness gracious, our children to provide us with everything we need and feel resentful when they don't? And then resentful when asked to invest to receive the support we need elsewhere. So it's understood that we invest in our physical house, but expected that we shouldn't invest just as much if not more in our mental, emotional, psychological, spiritual, physical house. Physical as in human body house. Why is that? Who says? Who made that rule?
Investment, a noun, an act of devoting time, effort, or energy to a particular undertaking with the expectation of a worthwhile result. Years ago, it became very clear to me that my family of origin was not the place to invest to create a change in my money relationship. No one's fault. No blame, shame or judgment, just privilege of agency. “Change me Divine Beloved into one who can roll with what cannot change, grateful even for hard knocks. Let me embrace all tests even when they come. And may I release any fear of financial loss, knowing all can be replenished with ease by divine will.”
I was going to need to go somewhere else to learn how to accomplish this type of change. And so I've been working with my mentor, spiritual teacher, therapist since 1995. Thank goodness. Because wow, where I've grown and where I continue to grow and where I will continue to grow under her mentorship. And here's evidence of where I've really grown regarding my privilege of agency and investment. More than once, I've raised her rate without even being asked.
Investment, a noun, an act of devoting time, effort, or energy to a particular undertaking with the expectation of a worthwhile result. I choose. I choose to acknowledge, honor, and respect where I devote my time, energy, and effort. I choose to define what is a worthwhile result for me.
Final story for this training. Listen and see what you receive. I was recently getting my hair cut in this neighborhood salon I've started going to. And while I'm getting my hair cut, I'm watching this scene play out behind me as I'm looking in my stylist’s mirror. This woman, this customer, comes in desperate to have something fixed about a cut, something that she got somewhere else. A stylist consults with her, gives a recommendation, the customer agrees. The stylist does her thing, and within minutes the customer's eyes light up with gratitude, relief, appreciation. We all get it. Hair, it's important. A joyful exchange between expert and customer. The customer then goes to the front counter to check out. And I can still see this in the mirror. And then exclaims very out loud to the entire salon. "Wow! $75? That's expensive. It took you less than five minutes."
Now, I take note in that moment that this customer is standing there decked out and in the brand Lululemon and has such a large diamond on her hand that I can see it from across the salon. Next, I catch myself and my next thought, "Who am I to judge? Maybe she works at Lululemon and gets a 90% discount. Maybe the diamond is a family heirloom passed down for generations. Maybe she's an actor shooting a commercial around the corner and this stuff doesn't even belong to her. Who knows?"
This isn't what matters. What matters is a customer came off the street with a terrible problem that was solved for her expertly. Yet in a matter of minutes, this customer went from relief and appreciation to resentment. Rather than seeing the investment of getting the solution she needed provided to her expertly, which in this instance also happened to include quickly, she only saw the cost. Equating what? Value of time, dismiss of the value of the stylist's expertise? In my opinion, in my experience, her outburst said loads about her and her own money story more than it said anything about the stylist and the service. Breath in, and let it out.
[00:16:39] Thank you for being a part of this Business Miracles podcast episode and for beginning to dip your toe into the journey of highly sensitive leadership training. If you are ready to truly use your sensitivities as strengths in all parts of your work and life, I invite you to connect for a one on one chat. You will experience being deeply listened to and together we'll get a sense of whether the Highly Sensitive Leadership Training Programs are the best next step for you and your highly sensitive journey at this time. Just go to www.claritycall.com to schedule a conversation. We so look forward to connecting with you. Talk to you soon!