[00:00:02] Welcome to the Business Miracles podcast. I'm Heather Dominick, founder of www.businessmiracles.com and author of the book Different: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution found at www.differentthebook.com. Since 2010, I've been training Highly Sensitive Entrepreneurs and Leaders from around the globe to work less while making more impact and income by doing things differently. I'm so glad you joined me. Listen in and get ready. Get ready for a shift in the way you view yourself, your work, your life. A business miracle.
[00:00:39] This is A Course in Business Miracles podcast episode 184, Fuel Your Magnificence. In this podcast episode, I read an excerpt from my book Different. I share my experience of feeling overwhelmed by the common coaching industry phrase, "Play a bigger game", and how this phrase triggered feelings of not enough for me. Rather than motivating me to create more, I discuss how rather than pushing yourself as an HSP to hustle to play a bigger game, you can access your inner magnitude, the HSP part of you that is connected to inner guidance and the magic of the universe. I share how you can access this part of you through self inquiry to claim what truly inspires you to then let this inspiration fuel, motivate, and encourage you to tap into your strengths and create from this space, rather than hustling to try to be someone you're not and crashing as a result. So let's uncover what inspiration you need to tap into your most magnificent self.
[00:01:58] Page 76 Magnitude versus Littleness. Though being of service is one of our greatest motivators as highly sensitive entrepreneurs and highly sensitive leaders and is thoroughly rewarding. It takes a fierce due diligence commitment.
We must be consistently engaged in the process of shifting from untrained to trained and creating rather than only coping. This is why magnitude versus littleness, a teaching that traces its origins to the spiritual and psychological curriculum of A Course in Miracles, is a foundation training in the Business Miracles, highly sensitive leadership training program for entrepreneurs. Back in the early two thousands, when I was first exposed to the coaching industry, there was a phrase I heard a lot, “Play a bigger game.” I'm sure it's a phrase still used by a lot of coaches. Every time I heard this phrase, it didn't sit well with me at the time. At the time I thought this was because there was something wrong with me. I thought, “There's all of this talk of playing a bigger game and all it does is make me want to run and hide what's wrong with me?”
Now I understand that as a highly sensitive person, I heard that phrase and my nervous system immediately interpreted it as pressure. As Dr. Aaron states, highly sensitives don't just try to protect themselves from being overwhelmed, but they try to protect themselves from even the slightest possibility of becoming overwhelmed. Without understanding at the time what was happening with my nervous system, I figured there was something wrong with me if I wasn't out there playing a bigger game. Rather than this phrase motivating me and I'm going to give the benefit of the doubt that this was the intention, it plugged into my highly sensitive sense of feeling like I was not enough. We always have a choice between the smaller socialized version of ourselves and the more magnanimous essential version of ourselves. Whatever choice we make will impact everything we do and all decisions we make. When I first connected with this teaching from A Course in Miracles, my response was, “Wait, what? Hold the phone? You mean I'm responsible for this? It isn't happening to me.”
As with everything, mindset management is an ongoing process. However, being able to consistently return to the teaching that I already have what I want need as core practice has provided a rock solid foundation. I may slip off the rock, but I can always come back to the rock rather than feeling unmoored, untethered and completely adrift as I previously did. This is where we remember how A Course in Miracles describes the Holy Spirit. That part within your mind that is automatically and naturally connected to your inner guidance, to your higher self, to the magic and the miracles of the universe at large. That part knows what your function is. You already have everything you need. Everything that I desired, everything that you desire, the value, the worth, the money was already in me, is already in you because it is me.
It is you. My magnitude is what's natural to me. Your magnitude is what's natural to you.
What this means for us as highly sensitive leaders is to stop trying to be someone we are not, and to instead tap deeply into our highly sensitive strengths and lead from this space. My magnitude, your magnitude is within everything that is natural to us as highly sensitives. We are aware of subtleties in our surroundings, better at spotting errors and good at avoiding making errors. We are highly conscientious. We can concentrate deeply. We are vigilant, we are accurate. We can detect minor differences. We can process materials to deep levels of what psychologists call somatic memory, which references how our bodies will remember even what our minds may forget. We also are often thinking about our own thinking. We can learn without being aware we've learned. We are deeply impacted by another person's moods and feelings. And when our nervous system is trained, we can use this to make sharp, accurate decisions quickly. We are specialists in fine motor movement. We are very good at holding still. We're more right-brained, less linear and more creative in a synthesizing way. We are more sensitive to things in the air, able to imagine possibilities, able to be visionary, able to understand how complex life and death really are. We are the royal advisors, counselors, teachers, coaches, historians, healers, upholders of justice, creatives. We are the balance to the other 80%. Breath and let it out.
So this is the time. This is the time right now to reflect on inspiration and whether you have enough of it in your life or not. This is the time to claim what it is that truly does inspire you. This is the time to reboot your spiritual practices, to set up containers of core practices for bringing in more inspiration more consistently. This is the time for fortifying your boundaries, and being able to say no to unreasonable expectations and responsibilities that are not yours. And this is the time to stop unnecessary expenditures of energy and to support yourself and clearing the space, the space that you need to rekindle enthusiasm, to activate inspiration or anything else you need to move forward. To have the courage to be able to name what does not inspire you, name, what does inspire you, and to craft step by step plan to shift into that space where you are leading by inspiration and motivation. There is an opportunity right now for big release specifically to surrender, surrender, surrender, surrender, stress, unnecessary effort, and other draining energies associated with shadow patterns, particularly people pleasing.
This is the time to begin to craft a plan to move away from what is not really important to you or part of your personal truth. This is also the time to be willing to be still, to think deeply, to feel deeply, to listen deeply. And as a result, this is the time to lighten your load physically, psychologically, emotionally and energetically. And to be willing to disappoint others if they are attached to your old or a different way of you being.
There is a great freedom on the other side of releasing the uninspired bits of your life. This is the time to acknowledge all of the growth, all of the accomplishments from the past year, and this is the time to just make note in general of how far you have come in your highly sensitive leadership journey, and to set yourself up to be in a space of optimism, creation and service to the highest good of all, which includes you. And the key to it all is inspiration. and to make the choice. So let's talk about inspiration that which inspires us and that which does not inspire us so much.
So the invitation and the opportunity now for everything that I just shared and listed out is not about entitlement, is not about frustration, is not about irritation, is not about temper tantrum, is not about reinforcing that highly sensitive limiting belief of, “See, I can't have what I want. I'm not inspired. Well, might as well just throw in the towel. Might as well just give up. Might as well just give in to comparison. I mean Heather said the key is inspiration and I'm not inspired.” When we're coming from a space of magnitude versus littleness, it comes back to curiosity and inquiry as the way through.
The places where you are not inspired are actually the places where you're meant to be paying deep attention. Where you're meant to be paying deep attention through inquiry, process and practice, not a cut and run, not a reason to be triggered into pushing your way through that which does not inspire you, not a reason to be triggered in hiding from that which does not inspire you, not a reason to combo platter back and forth between pushing and hiding and pushing and hiding regarding that which does not inspire you, but instead to get curious and to ask. The relationships that don't inspire you. Get curious and ask, don't change your address and move. The tasks that don't inspire you, don't shut your laptop and leave for the day, get curious and ask. If you come to the end of the day and you're like, “My gosh, how did I use my time today? I don't even know what I did.” Don't start looking for a job or a new job, get curious and ask
This is a good time to contemplate bringing the things in your life that do not inspire you to a natural completion. And this is also a time to lean into curiosity as you set your sights on stepping into what is next for you, to inquire deeply how am I using my energy? Where am I spending my time? Is it inspiring? Where am I spending my resources? Is it inspiring? If the answer is no, then the next question is how can I make it inspiring? What needs to change? When we're in comparison energy, There is a part of us that limbic that is flipped and through that flipped limbic, we're convinced that the answer is external. We're convinced that the answer is outside of us, and there's a part of us that in that space is addicted to the chaos, is addicted to the overwhelm.
It is the ultimate in terms of highly sensitive victimhood. If you find yourself in some form of a constant state, if you find yourself in any way using or thinking the phrase or phrases such as “This always happens. Here I am again. I know this feeling intimately.” That is a signal that we are running neural pathways out of familiarity, habit, and often addiction, not predetermined destiny. When you are able to recognize those addictions, those habits, those patterns, then the door to transformation has opened. That is awareness in AUK and it is recognized in RAINSit, and both are indicators of the potential for change. Now, that is the exact opposite of how most highly sensitives function. Most highly sensitives use the addictions, use the habits, use the patterns to reinforce the reasons of the shadows, of the coping mechanisms, but as highly sensitives who have chosen, the path of a being trained highly sensitive, who have chosen the path of empowerment, we're not interested in the false allure of victimhood anymore.
We are here to balance the other 80%, and it won't come after you've taken all the courses, put all the bells and whistles on your website and generated a certain amount of income. But that space of true freedom, liberation, that true space of potentiality, possibility, being able to work in a gorgeous experience of lifelong creation comes from the willingness to inquire and be curious. and to make change from that space. And so this is where you've heard me say, everyone wants transformation, but no one wants to change because change means, “Oh yeah, what is that RAINSit tool that I've heard Heather talk about? Oh yeah. Oh, well, that doesn't really necessarily work for me in the way that she's mapped it out, but oh, that was a super inspired idea by somebody that we could use auto writing to actually use RAINSit. That's cool.”
Or, “Oh geez, I'm really not happy with this part of my business, this part of my life. So what's a core practice I'm going to put in place to shift it and change the experience? What's the support I'm going to ask for accountability? And let me be willing to lean in to discover what is contributing to these repeated patterns so that through that discovery I can then put things in place and do it differently.” But all of that requires the willingness to practice, practice, practice, to work, work, work. To call on higher support, to call on community, to be willing to be vulnerable, to be seen in shame, in rage, in disappointment.
Willingness, willingness, willingness. Breath in, and let it out.
[00:24:14] Thank you for being a part of this Business Miracles podcast episode and for beginning to dip your toe into the journey of highly sensitive leadership training. If you are ready to truly use your sensitivities as strengths in all parts of your work and life, I invite you to connect for a one on one chat. You will experience being deeply listened to and together we'll get a sense of whether the Highly Sensitive Leadership Training Programs are the best next step for you and your highly sensitive journey at this time. Just go to www.claritycall.com to schedule a conversation. We so look forward to connecting with you. Talk to you soon!
